Below are the descriptions of each of the five love languages (for adults):
(From their website: www.5lovelanguages.com)
What if you could say or do just the right thing guaranteed to make that special someone feel loved? The secret is learning the right love language!
- Words of Affirmation
Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.
- Quality Time
In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.
- Receiving Gifts
Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.
- Acts of Service
Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.
- Physical Touch
This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.
My love language is Acts of Service and Receiving Gifts.
My husband's is Physical Touch and Quality Time.
Emily's is Quality Time and Words of Affirmation.
Hannah's is Quality Time and Physical Touch.
So knowing each of our family members' love language helps us give love to each person more thoughtfully and consciously. Many parents may think Receiving Gifts are always on the top for kids but that's not true. I personally know of some children that would prefer Words of Affirmation and Quality Time than a Gift. I mean gifts can't hurt but words or time spent with them are so much more meaningful AND it builds memories.
Take the test yourself, then give the test to your kids. You might be surprised with their results.
I'd love to hear what your love language is.
Assessment
BTW, my husband and his bible study colleagues are going to see "Courageous" this week.
It's a movie about : "Four men, one calling: To serve and protect. As law enforcement officers, Adam Mitchell, Nathan Hayes, David Thomson, and Shane Fuller are confident and focused. Yet at the end of the day, they face a challenge that none of them are truly prepared to tackle: fatherhood. While they consistently give their best on the job, good enough seems to be all they can muster as dads. But they're quickly discovering that their standard is missing the mark. When tragedy hits home, these men are left wrestling with their hopes, their fears, their faith, and their fathering. Can a newfound urgency help these dads draw closer to God ... and to their children?"
I encourage you fathers (and mothers and teens) to go see it. I've heard nothing but awesome reviews about it. It'll impact your view about being a parent.
Just a PSA..
